Sexless Marriages

Just how many normal, happy, sexy couples turn their lives of wedded bliss into sexless marriages?

More than you think.

It’s one of the most requested Google searches each day. If you’re one of them, you’re far from being alone.

Researching sites, blogs, forums, research reports and government fact sheets on exactly how many couples live without sex will produce plenty of numbers. Let me tell you, they vary greatly.

Sexless Marriages. Non verbal communication

I believe this is because not every one of them is prepared to voice their concerns to strangers through questionnaires. Others refuse to accept the truth that marriage has stalled. In between these two lies confusion about what defines a sexless marriage. For some, the term refers to a number greater than zero. Having sex just once is all that’s needed the keep from checking the yes box.

Reports suggest the number could be as high as a quarter of all those who take nuptials end up experiencing sexless marriages.

“One couple interviewed for SEETHINGS gave two different answers about their levels of intimacy.

She said their sex-health was fine. He admitted they hadn’t been intimate in months.

It’s a sexless marriage – but neither of them said so.”

In Japan, the number is higher. Complex social issues have had an adverse impact on relationships in general. Sexless marriages are almost as common as not with 47% of married couples reporting having a dead bedroom.

In the Bible Belt, the numbers are unusually low. Christians are proud of their effort, however, they tend to keep their sexual dysfunctions to themselves anyway. It is God, Faith, and Prayer that deals with intimate relations, not public polls.

Sex and religion have always been uneasy bedfellows. It is for this reason I believe the reports are inaccurate.

Sexless marriages discussions fall into a couple of frequently listed points:

  • Boredom
  • Cheating
  • Health
  • Laziness
  • Neglect
  • Fall out of love
  • Distraction
  • Erectile Dysfunction
  • Pornography
  • Counseling
  • Abuse

Abusers (a term now used by an neglected spouse who sometimes uses the word ‘deniar’ or ‘denier’.) knowingly and disrespectfully disregarded by their sexual partner.

The abused experiences a sense of helplessness. They descend into an emotional free-fall, mixed with disappointment, depression, anxiety, frustration and anger.

sexless marriages causes silent pain

Abusers often remain unaware of how much pain they cause their spouses. They deflect questions on matters of sex and often deny being the cause of such abuse.

“The more frustrated of spouses plan holidays alone or take up a hobby that specifically excludes the abuser.

‘Cocooning’ is an act of desperation – to control a space of their own.

The most desperate ones take a lover… or their own life.”

Monogamy is a demanding relationship construct. It ORDERS us to be everything for our partner, ALWAYS and FOREVER.

Sexless marriages lead to a feeling of guilt

We’re told there will be bumps along the way but if true love and commitment exists, happiness and peace will prevail. Failure to achieve these leads to feelings of guilt.

For those in long term sexless marriages, there’s only so much shame and guilt that can be dissolved into reality. If our partner doesn’t seem to care no matter how hard we try, what the hell are we to do next?

Hi. I’m Michael Forman, author of SEETHINGS.

I’m thrilled to have you here. I’ve had a great time bringing my sexless marriages narrative into the light so someone like you can read and understand it.

SEETHINGS was at the core of my goal to bring human’s animal to the surface of consciousness. Between the conflicts of sex, romantic love, guilt, desire, Faith and civility lies a slumbering Beast. One way or another, it will wake to take charge.

SEETHINGS is deeply confronting and has an ending you’ll never see coming. You will be shocked.

It’s is available in Paperback and eBook versions. You’re only seconds away from reading SEETHINGS in all it’s diabolical glory!

Michael Forman (Author)

‘Forman’s writing style is artful, with the protagonist Mitchell’s warped thought processes masterfully exposed. The author has a powerful and vivid command of language and his word pictures are stark and disturbingly real.’  – Linda J Bettenay, author of ‘Secrets Mothers Keep’ and ‘Wishes For Starlight’.

Thanks for your comment on this post! (In advance)